Phoenix Fights

Fighting the FEAR, depression and BDP on a daily basis AND making my own bread. Bring it on 2016….




Here we are, it’s not even the end of March, and I’m another friendship down.

Not too good a result on that particular resolution, but the loss of ‘Ms Why’ doesn’t feel like much of a loss at this moment in time.

To have someone deliberately wind you when you fire off several warning shots, push for a confrontation when you do everything in your power to avoid one, and then behave like an infantile, classless, cat fighting chav is a definite deal breaker, not to mention she fought dirty with regard to using jeers and insults about my condition to wound me, so things have now been said by both of us that can never be taken back.

I know I’m intolerant, sensitive and I have a very sharp tongue when riled, but I can only take so much before retaliating and if I’m sorry about anything, it’s only about the way that it ended rather than the fact it has ended.

What price dignity?  Sigh…..

Ironic that this should happen after getting into some quite spiritual stuff on the Artists Way and forging a closer relationship with the Higher Power, but maybe this was meant to be for the long term good.  God moves in mysterious ways and all that.

My charming, eloquent bete noire’s final parting shot was ‘Have fun with your internet friends!’ the implication being that my blog contacts are the only friends I have.

These words would have sounded pathetic coming from the mouth of a 13 year old mean girl, but they came in fact from a forty plus year old company director and I’m ashamed and embarrassed that we interacted the way that we did.  Urgh.

I did everything I could to prevent it though, but she just kept pushing me.

They say you should never supermarket shop when hungry; I’d like to add that you should never shop at all when angry, especially in Liberty.

My credit card has taken something of a pounding and is whimpering in the corner of my bag as we speak.  Mind you had I had this exchange face to face with Ms No-One-Likes-You-And-You-Smell-Of-Poo it could have got a whole lot messier.

Let’s thank God for small mercies.

And I do so love a happy ending! 🙂




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