Phoenix Fights

Fighting the FEAR, depression and BDP on a daily basis AND making my own bread. Bring it on 2016….


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A rare hot day in sunny Londinium and the park is packed.

I have a sore back, dark shadowed eyes from lack of sleep, and a head packed with shit I don’t want to think about.

Eyes front, going anti clockwise, round and round the park I go.

I can’t get this song out of my head. But it is keeping me focused and I’m glad of its company.

Round and round and round. The same way, the same route, it’s all the same to me.

Pass the lake and don’t stop….sorry ducks, no time today, got to keep on going….

Pass the ice cream van….a bottle of water would be nice, but I don’t want to break my stride….

Round and round, round and round….

Sun beating down on my uncovered head, bare legs tingling from the unfamiliar exposure to the elements.

A man approaches stripped to the waist, shorts pulled down as low as possible to display a very respectable six pack. He stares. ‘Very sexy girl!’ he hisses as we pass.

At me?! These sunglasses must be covering most of my ageing visage, he’d have a heart attack if I took them off.

As a rule I would at least smile in acknowledgment of the compliment/attempted pick up, but today the thought of doing anything that might make him bolder makes me feel seriously queasy.

Eyes front, ears resistant, just keep going….

C’mon feet don’t fail me now, I’ve got 10 zillion miles to go, I’ve got nine, eight, seven…..


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