Phoenix Fights

Fighting the FEAR, depression and BDP on a daily basis AND making my own bread. Bring it on 2016….



‘On the interview show Inside the Actors’ Studio, host James Lipton asks each of his guests the same ten questions. What are your responses?’


On cold, grey days like this, when all I see is doom, gloom and Christmas looming, these little prompts really are a blogger’s life line….. 

On with the questions:


Now this is a difficult one, rather like choosing your favourite cake, wine or HBO programme….

I love words that are so descriptive, they can do it all, and then some, on their ownsome.

Words like sumptuous, malevolent, and a particular favourite, exquisite.  If someone tells you that a person/dress/performance was exquisite it tells you everything you need to know about that person/thing/experience and you can see it clearly in your mind’s eye.

A more economical word that I loved to use in my scarier, Queen Bitch days when was pissed off with someone/something, was evidently.

Sounds innocent, doesn’t it?  But this simple four syllable term, phrased and intoned in the right way can chill the offending person right down to the bone.

An example:

Your Partner – “Oh, I’m so sorry, I thought we said 8pm not 7.30pm, but anyway it’s only just started raining, your hair looks lovely all curly like that and hey, I’m, erm, here now!’

You, with soft, cold menace – ‘Evidently’

Tradesman – “Well it didn’t turn out quite how you expected luv, but we can do so much, you can cover it up with a picture, and my boys did the best they could!”

You, in clipped tones, with excoriating scorn, and a slighly raised eyebrow – ‘Evidently’

And so on.  Help yourself, I’m sure you’ll get as much pleasure from it as I have! 🙂

I also love plenty, as it is such a comforting, reassuring, generous word without implying greed.



I know I run the risk of offending people here, but I have to be honest, I absolutely loathe the use of the ‘word’ ‘anyways’.

For a kick off, it’s an adverb and shouldn’t be used in the plural, secondly it just sounds so wet and passive aggressive because whenever I’ve heard it, it’s being used by someone who thinks the other person is being unreasonable and/or talking shit and they want to change the subject.  So instead of saying ‘You’re talking absolute bollocks’ they sigh, roll their eyes and say ‘…well, anyways….’ 

Just hearing said out loud makes my arse clench with suppressed rage, and I have to fight the urge to grab them by the throat and scream, spraying their face with spittle, ‘The word is ANYWAY!  A-NY-WAY!’

I have no idea why it riles me so much.

It’s especially annoying when men use it (?!) and a particular ‘friend’ of mine now makes a point of saying it as often as possible whenever we meet to get a rise out me.  For my part, I refrain from letting him see even a flicker of my mounting irritation, but have to excuse myself and go to the Ladies, where I can fall to my knees, howl with anguish and claw at the tiles for five minutes before composing myself, making use of the vending machine and dropping a tampon in his beer by way of revenge. 🙂



Authenticity, every time.  People who are being who they really are, and create great stuff because that’s what comes out of them, and not because they are trying to sell more records/books, get more press, or make people like them.   People who are focussed on expressing themselves rather than on their potential income or popularity.

For example, Amy Winehouse was absolutely, 100%, the real deal, amazingly talented and innovative, and did everything she could to keep herself to herself and avoid the press, who, because they found her lifestyle shocking, stalked her mercilessly and drove her to an early grave.


Then there is Mylie Cyrus the home grown Disney Princess, who was moulded into a career of being a clean cut girl next door, has yet to do anything musically to make me (or anyone else that I can see) sit up straight and listen, so is now jumping around in front of the world’s media like one of those eejits who goes to the Running of the Bulls, flashing her labia, dry humping anyone that stands still for five minutes, desperately trying to shock in the hope that the resulting notoriety keeps her famous and in the money instead of working on her ‘talent’.  Someone ought to tell her that the press won’t go away when she wants some privacy and she may live to regret baiting them like this.

And that is the difference between a star and a celebrity.


And no matter how drunk or drugged poor, vulnerable Amy got, or how many times she fell over in the street, I don’t ever think that we ever got to see her minny, which let’s face it, is how it should be.

What was I saying?  Oh yes, and individuality and innovation!  I love to hear a track on the radio or put down a book and think ‘Who the hell was that? They are amazing, I want more!’  and then hunt their back catalogue down.  And one day I would love to produce something that will make others say that about me. Fat chance, but no harm in wishing, hey?


Tolerance, acceptance and non judgement (says Ms Tolerance herself – ha!).  Truly spiritual people do not spout rules, dogma or threats at others, they share their knowledge when asked, work quietly through their karma, try not to let the mind-monkeys get to them and help others along the way, no matter what their religion, if and when they can.


Honesty.  Simple as that.


Oh God, where to start?

Usually people.

People who spit in the street, eat chicken on the bus and hurl the bones everywhere, people who chat/text/eat/drink loudly in the cinema and kick the back of your seat, Jeremy Kyle, snotty egg whites, intrusiveness, people who talk loudly on the mobiles/cell, attention seekers, fakes, ‘celebrities’, cruelty to kids and animals, people who yell at their kids in the street, people who wear fur, cheap, sugary cup cakes, gobshites, arse lickers, greasy pole climbers, game players, processed food and fizzy drinks.

I’m going to stop now, before you start thinking that I am one intolerant biatch…..


Oh, that’s probably going to have to be twat; it’s so emphatic! 😉


The sound of the ocean, baby laughter,  a knife going into freshly baked bread, early morning birdsong, crickets in a hot country at dusk, the sound of a yoga bell calling me to satsang, thunder and lightning, the roar of a big cat, my little cats ‘talking’ to me with their strange little chirrups and meows, the sound of a kettle boiling for m’tea of a morning.


Intrusive chatter, the alarm clock, supermarket muzak, electronic voices on phones/tablets, other people having domestics, crying children, bills hitting the mat, someone hawking up snot <retch>, people having sex (it’s surprisingly boring to listen to), doors slamming, pneumatic drills.


A columnist, an author, cafe owner, healer, maybe even an actor, as I’ve recently discovered, I find it much easier to be someone else than be myself.


Politician, middle manager, PR, sales, any role that would require me to be anything other than my authentic, ethical, honest, bullshit free self.


“OK, stop your whining, you’re back!  Told you it wasn’t that bad didn’t I? It all came right in the end, didn’t it?  OK, you’ve done your bit, you never have to go back down there again!  Unless you want to, that is….”

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12 thoughts on “Daily Prompt: CRACKED ACTOR

  1. There’s so much to love in your writing, Sista. “Mind-monkeys”. Love. It. Can I use it?

  2. Pingback: What if I answered some questions? | Okay, what if ?

  3. Thank you for that laugh-out-loud. I really needed it tonight. May we wake to birdsongs tomorrow instead of alarm clocks!

  4. Excellent. 🙂 The Phoenix has spoken.

  5. Well written piece. Loved ur blog post completely.

  6. Pingback: Daily Prompt: Inside the Actor’s Studio | Chronicles of an Anglo Swiss

  7. Pingback: Daily Prompt: Inside the Actor’s Studio | Life as a country bumpkin...not a city girl

  8. Pingback: Catching Up in Writing Prompts | 365 Days of Thank You

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